Driving is hell in NYC (in case you didn't already know)

Hey, look! It's Tudor City. I totally almost lived there until I looked at a few apartments and cried. They were so ridiculously tiny. Like 200 sq. feet tiny. And when they built Tudor City people didn't have kitchens in their apartments (they ate in mess-hall style cafeterias) so you would see one of the closets sacrificed to the gods of hot plates and dorm fridges. But that is not what this post is about.



And oh hey there's the Chrysler Building with Tudor City! Great shots right? You don't usually see shots from this angle. You see I got these great pictures while sitting on the FDR. Yep. I was in a car. Driving. Don't worry, I wasn't taking pictures while zooming along at (ahem) 40 mph because that's the speed limit. Nope. I was at a standstill thanks to gawd awful city traffic.



On Wednesday it took me 2.5 hours to get to New Rochelle for a Seder. It should have taken me an hour tops. I should have predicted traffic would be hell but I had no idea how bad. I didn't want to take the train because my cousin doesn't really live near a train station. So instead I decided to get a Mini Cooper from Zipcar and zoom and sing at the top of my lungs. I left work early and started the commute at 4:30 from Battery Park City.

(Quick tangent: There is no Mini Cooper on the east side of Financial District. What gives Zipcar? That's your friggin flagship vehicle. Oh and PS the cars at the Cedar St garage are always messy inside and have less than 1/4 tank. I have animosity against my neighborhood Zipsters. Thanks especially to the person who left a Starbucks soy latte in the BMW 328 overnight! My car ride was so pleasant in 30 degree temperatures with the windows down to alleviate the smell.)

My cousin had given me directions going up the West Side but my friend who'd left 30 minutes before me called to warn me off that path. So I thought I would just zip up the FDR drive to the Triboro aka RFK bridge to 95. Oh man. What a mess the FDR was! At 5 PM I hadn't made it to Houston St. At 5:30 PM I was just passing Tudor City. At 6 PM I was near tears at 96th St. Side streets were no better. It was the massive Passover commute!

I have never hit such bad traffic on the FDR. When I lived on the Upper East Side I'd just get on at 96th St and sometimes it would be stop and go. This was just stop. The only good news was that I got to take in the pretty scenery. I went through two CDs before I cleared Manhattan. I almost turned around twice -- the only thing that stopped me was that the traffic was equally bad going southbound. And the WORST was all the idiot drivers weaving in and out of traffic trying to gain any position. I picked the left lane and stayed there almost the whole way up.

Wait though. It gets better. Around the Queensboro Bridge I heard sirens behind me. Thinking it was an emergency I moved over. Except it wasn't an ambulance. It was the Mayor's caravan. Yep, that's right. The Mayor who takes the subway to work was apparently in such a rush to get home that they had to make a traffic jam even worse. I hope he made it in time for dinner!

I almost didn't. I was ridiculously late. So was everyone else though. And for contrast, the trip home took me 40 minutes. And it would have been shorter but I got caught by the toll shift change entering Manhattan. I wasn't even speeding! I didn't have to brake around corners though...god bless Mini Coopers.

Lack of Zipcar availability sends me Zipping in style

Were it not for Zipcar, I probably would not live in the city. I'm not even kidding. After getting over the cost factor the toughest part of moving to NYC was giving up my beloved SUV Hunk. You don't need a car in the city but sometimes I like to escape and the places I like to escape to require a car. Zipcar fills that need pretty nicely. They know their target audience well: the factor that pushed me over the top was that they have nice cars from recent model years. So long, Ford Focus rentals. Hello, Mazda 3 with a sunroof and nice sound system.

The downside is that it's really hard to get a Zipcar on the weekend days in the summer. You need to book your car two or three weeks in advance, and for some cars (Mini Coopers) further in advance than that. It speaks to both the popularity and the frustration of the company. I recently upgraded my plan from a pay as you go to a monthly plan but besides a small discount on my rentals I don't really get any perks. It would be nice to have some kind of preferential car access or something.

I love the Minis and always try to book them but so do a lot of other Zipsters. So lately I've been trying to broaden my horizons and try other cars. I was disappointed by the Jetta (though my sister owns one and loves it) and the Honda Fit was cool but a pain in the ass to park. My last rental was kind of a kick though. I was invited to an outdoor dinner party up in Connecticut but out of the range of Metro North. It was only 4 days before so I knew I'd need luck to find a car available near me.

Luck was sort of on my side: a car was available 4 blocks away. But that car was a BMW 328, which is pretty expensive to rent. And it's kind of big. And seriously, a BMW? When I think BMW I think 80s yuppie. But I suppose I am sort of a yup pup and so I booked it with a chuckle.

Come that Saturday I went to the garage to pick of the car. All the Zipcars are named with the same first letter of the car brand, so this car was Beaumont. I handed my Zipcard to the garage attendant and said "Beaumont please." He nodded and lowered a silver Beemer that was on a set of risers. I could not stop laughing at myself. The best was when I sat in the driver's seat. I am 5'8" and I could barely see over the dashboard. Whoever had the car before me had reclined the seat back pretty far to go cruising. The cockpit was so big and filled with so many instruments compared to cars I've driven that I really felt like I was about to fly a jet. I took a few minutes to reset the seat and my mirrors. Then I put the fob in the ignition and started the car. I half-expected a computerized voice to say "Welcome, Roxy."

I picked up friend M outside a subway station. I somehow managed to parallel park the car in one shot. When he came out of the station I beeped the horn and like I had before he started laughing. Doubled over, in fact. Once recovered he opened the rear passenger side door and said, "So, I ride in the back, right?" With a bit of convincing he moved up front and we spent a couple of minutes laughing at the ridiculousness of it all. "I feel underdressed driving this thing," I said.

Once on the highway I was trying not to speed because I felt really conspicuous. It was hard. M and I would start chatting and when I checked my speedometer I'd be going a lot faster than it felt like. I tried riding in the center lane but it didn't matter. Even the right lane does 70 in I-95. As soon as we got to Connecticut I left the highway for the back roads so I could control my speed better.

When we got to our friend's place I was exhausted from driving a big car. We had a great time and a great dinner. Once the party broke up, one of my friends asked "Who has the BMW?" I was blocking him in the driveway. "Oh, that would be Mademoiselle Roxy over there," said M helpfully. I gave a curtsy and reminded everyone that I only drive in style.

Me and Zipcar might have to throw down

You hurt me, Zipcar.
You hurt me real bad.

Sigh. The love affair had to end sometime I guess. Despite all the raves I've been pouring on Zipcar since I started using it they just dissed me through email. I received this note from them:

Hi Roxy,

After your reservation in [redacted] on [redacted] it was reported to us that the interior of the vehicle was left in poor condition, with litter and/or personal belongings left behind.

The Zipcar "6 Simple Rules" notes that all members are required to leave the car free of trash or personal belongings for the next member. Violations of this policy can result in penalties or cleaning charges.

If this report was the result of an existing condition in the vehicle, please remember, it is the responsibility of all Zipcar members to report any damage or cleanliness issues prior to the start of the reservation so that we may hold the appropriate person responsible, and ensure that all members have a pleasant experience.

Please visit the member help center for more information on this, and other Zipcar rules and information:

https://www.zipcar.com/help/

Best regards,
Zipcar Member Services

Not to overstate this, because at the end of the day it's not the biggest deal in the world but WTF??? Anyone who knows me knows I kept my cars anally clean when I owned them. Friends who tried to leave empty soda cans or food wrappers in my car got a healthy dose of evil eye. I never used my car as storage like some people do and I'd get really upset if anything happened to spill in my car. And now I get to drive much cooler cars through the Zipster. So what the hell?

I'm almost offended that best friend service Zipcar has backstabbed me so. And the lamest part is directing me to their help pages -- like oh OK I don't know how to keep a car clean. Please. Or encouraging me to tattle on other people. I suppose there is some minute chance that I left a receipt in the car or something....but not really.

Certainly, if the car is damaged or in bad shape when I take it I'm going to report it. I once had a Scion that had spills everywhere to the point of discoloration so I called Zipcar (they already knew). But good lord people. If I get into a car and it has a candy wrapper or something in it, I'm not calling Zipcar. I'm throwing the damn thing out.

My feelings are hurt, Zipcar. You make me emo.

Laundry time

I had put off doing laundry for too long, so it was back up to Connecticut over the weekend. Usually I stuff my largest suitcase full of my dirty clothes and take a taxi to Grand Central. But this time around I had so much crap that I ended up booking another Mini Cooper through Zipcar.

OK, actually I just wanted to drive the Mini again. Can you blame me?

Unfortunately I needed a 24-hour rental and the two closest to me were booked. I had to go down to Central Park South to pick a different one up on Saturday. The garage was right near the Time Warner Center and I was very tempted to shop. Another time. I got there a bit early so I admired the horse carriages on CPS and missed my horses. It might not be a sight to see for much longer; NYC is considering a ban on the carriages. Finally, it was 1 PM and time to pick up my car. It had been a bit of a haul to get down there and the wait was killing me.

The trek was completely worth it though. First of all, it was a kick driving through Midtown. I felt a bit cool cruising in my little urbanite car as the pedestrians strolled the holiday-themed streets. On 3rd Ave I cruised from right to left lanes while making my way uptown.

When I got back to my apartment to load up, there was no parking. I had to park illegally in front of a hydrant and run back and forth. The stress led me to miss a few items that needed to be laundered. But who cared? I was eager to be in a car; where I could sing as loud as I want, drive as fast as traffic would allow and enjoy a quiet, serene, solitary travel experience.

Once I hit the road, the FDR sucked as usual but I was able to weave effortlessly between lanes. After I cleared the Triborough Bridge it was smooth sailing. It was amazing to me as I sped along that cars were still passing me as though I were standing still. I-95 is crazy like that. I hit the predictable traffic in Greenwich, Stamford and just before my exit in Norwalk.

Since I had a car, I brought "Guitar Hero III" for 360 with me. This made me my old roommate's hero. We watched movies, played some games, and generally chilled. I laughed that our house seemed so huge to me now that I live in a tiny apartment. And it's true -- my friend's studio on the UWS once seemed so small to me and now it also seems big by comparison. Having a whole house to explore was like being in a mansion.

Saturday night I cleaned Kohl's out of tights but forgot to get new sunglasses. I lost mine somewhere in the Brooklyn Target a couple of weeks ago. I cruised around every suburban store as my one-stop. I was loading up while I had a car at my disposal.

Early Sunday morning, I was drifting off to sleep when I heard the dreaded sound of a car alarm. Living in the city you'd think I'd be used to the sound but I jerked awake, worried someone was breaking into my rental. It turned out to be a car down the street but the alarm went off all friggin' night. Sometimes I'd fall asleep only to have the alarm wake me up again. It was pretty miserable and I barely slept. I missed my room and was a bit tempted to kick the current roommate out -- I'm the guest, you may sleep on the futon.

On the way back to the city two weird things happened with the car. First, I couldn't get the gas card to work. That was annoying. Secondly, my EZ-Pass which had worked fine on the way to Connecticut didn't work at the toll entering Manhattan. It's illegal to back up in the toll lane, so I had to wait until the attendant came over.

"Where's your pass?" The attendant asked me. I pointed to it, right below my rearview mirror. "Yes, thank you, it's the white thing on your windshield. Gimme it," he snarled. So I did, all the while thinking that was pretty rude of him. Sometimes New Yorkers are jerks. He held the pass up to a sensor and it worked fine. He gave it back to me and told me to move along. I resisted the urge to retort in kind.

I made it back to the city in time for NFL. I was meeting up with friends at Ship of Fools to watch the Packers game. I cheered excitedly as Greg Jennings and Ryan Grant ran up the points for my fantasy team and was happy when the Pack won. (I am the worst 49ers fan ever.) We ended up staying for the Pats-Steelers rout, and afterwards I stumbled home drunk and tired.

After a quick nap, I started unpacking my laundry. I like to use good-smelling detergent and in my drunken state I was all about the smell of my clean laundry. In fact I was so all about the smell that I dumped my suitcase out on my bed and laid down in it. The things you do when you're drunk. I drifted to sleep dreaming about Colorado...

...but woke up a few hours later feeling not so great. The combination of wings, beer and Mountain Spring Tide made my stomach uneasy. Ever wake up with that pukey feeling? I struggled to make it out of my bed, desperate not to throw up on my nice clean laundry. Now when I smell my laundry, I feel a bit pukey. It's that not so fresh feeling.

Mini makes everything better

I had the pleasant experience of using Zipcar again. And this time around, there would be no denying me my Mini Cooper experience. So pleased was I that I needed to share it with my friends.

I was just a bit excited about my Mini.

When I picked it up this morning, I jumped up and down like an idiot and clapped as the lot attendant drove it up to me. It was red! It was shiny! It came with a medallion, not a key! You press a button to start it! It had a hard drive! I am so simple to please.

I got in and absorbed the coolness of the car. My first favorite thing was that there is a "Start/Stop" button to turn the car on and off. When you insert the medallion into the keyslot, the car emits a couple of pleasant tones, not the monotone beeps normal cars give. I know the button is slowly becoming a common feature in cars but it felt very "Get Smart" to me. I was also happy about the amount of interior room -- plenty. I'm pretty tall and I was wearing heels but I didn't feel crowded at all. My God, I am totally this car's target demographic. Minus the money to buy it or room to store it when not in use.

The car's interior had appealing styling and
was quite roomy for a little coupe.

A car is a ridiculous luxury in New York City. But somehow driving a compact makes it seem a little less challenging while maintaining an air of extravagance. I may have been on-level with the wheels of most of the SUVs, but I felt small, maneuverable and sneaky. Plus, I was jonesing for some driving time. At one point, I switched the car into fake manual mode so I could utilize the steering wheel shift paddles.

It's a dangerous yet thrilling experience driving in the city. And pretending like I'm Charlize Theron in the "Italian Job" remake makes it twice as fun. I deftly weaved and bobbed through the midday traffic on may to New Jersey, and channeled my inner stunt driver on the way back through the Holland Tunnel.

Back in Manhattan, I picked up a friend to drive to lunch. As I drove up to his office, I tooted the horn and waved like a madwoman. He was completely cool and reminded me that he drives a company Mercedes, so he would not be impressed by my temporary Mini. But after wheeling our way through midtown he admitted he was a bit impressed. After lunch he asked if he could drive it. Sorry buddy, I replied, this baby's all mine.

After work I gave BFF M a ride home from her job. She at least shared in my excitement. With the sun long gone, we utilized the double sunroof to take in the skyscrapers at night. At one point we drove under the giant snowflake by 5th Ave in the 60s and got a killer view from underneath. We agreed that with our (pretend) million dollar bonuses from work, a Mini Cooper would be on our list of purchases.

The only downside? I had to gas up the car and it is not cheap. Though the gas fees are included in the Zipcar membership, I was still a bit disturbed when a tank fill-up cost $45. Minis take premium fuel and it has been awhile since I bought a tank. I forgot how expensive gas has gotten.

Sadly, Mini Cooper is now back at the garage for another Zipster to use. But I must say that for all the times I miss Hunk, my old SUV, it is nice to be free to see other cars every once in awhile.

Visiting Julio

Zippy.

After Sunday's debacle at Enterprise, I've been feeling pretty bummed all week. I'm in the middle of submitting a passionate complaint to the Better Business Bureau but in the meantime my crap for storage has been sitting around my apartment eating up valuable space. Worse, on Sunday the mouse made an appearance, peeking out from below the boxes stacked in front of my closet. Oy. I felt like I couldn't catch a break.

On Sunday night I applied to join ZipCar. The application was pretty straightforward - they asked for my name, address, some basic license information and asked if I'd ever been in an accident, etc. Still, I was surprised when on Tuesday I was already approved! I'd chosen to pick my card up at their office since it was less than 5 blocks away from work. I went to the office, got my card and asked "Is that it?" with a touch of shock in my voice. "That's it," they replied. "Now go Zip!" (OK, I made that last part up.) No stupid deposits in the hundreds of dollars. No embarrassing bureaucratic red tape. Just a background check on my driving record, and voila, I was in. They even waived the application fee since I was already a Zip member through work.

I had chosen the pay-as-you-go plan since I doubted I could justify the cost of the monthly plan. To book a car, you go to ZipCar.com, find the nearest depot and choose from the available cars. There is a depot 3 blocks away from me at 79th b/t 1st and York. Nice. I decided to book a car for a few hours on Wednesday. Since it was Tuesday evening, the availability was a bit slim but there were still multiple cars for me to choose from. I was disappointed but not really surprised that no Minis were free. Instead, I booked a Scion.

Wednesday after work I headed over to the garage and picked up my car. Really cool feature - I just had to hold my ZipCard up to a sensor on the windshield to unlock the car and confirm my pickup time. This would be very handy if you lock the keys in the car...unless your purse with the ZipCard also happens to be in the car. I was not excited about the Scion until I saw it. The older versions were very masculine - boxy and kind of fugly. But this was a brand new one with more roundness up front and it was actually kind of cute. Scion is actually a subset of Toyota and this Scion looked like a mini Rav4. It had some pep too.

My biggest fear was finding parking on my street to load up my crap, but as luck would have it there was a parking spot open two buildings away. The car was small so it easily fit in the tight spot although it had a blind spot in the worst possible place for parallel parking. I was happy to find that there was enough room behind the car to open the hatch, another fear.

R and T were back to help me load up. I also learned a new game in NYC - "Are you leavin'?" aka "You pullin' out" aka let me just slide my car up right next to yours. I felt bad since parking is so tight as I told each person in succession that it would be awhile. At least everyone was very polite about it. I thought one of the drivers would curse me out, but no one did.

After we loaded up we scarfed pizza for energy. I had planned to drive the boys to the unit but the Scion was packed to the brim. So they hoped in a taxi and followed me across town to the Manhattan Mini Storage up near Columbia. I drove through Central Park - what a kick! I'd always wanted to do that.

I backed into the dock and called M. She lived a block away and wanted to come say hi. The boys started unloading my stuff onto carts provided (thanks guys!) while M and I oohed and aahed over the ZipCar. We took the shot at the top of this post in the loading dock.

"Look!" she said. "This car has a name just like Hunk did." Sure enough, the car was named Dakota. Seemed appropriate given my penchant for naming inanimate objects. We decided that the storage unit needed a name too. M had received a welcome letter from the manager of the storage complex. I read the letter and joked it was like it came from the unit itself. And that settled it - we named the unit after the manager. We were going to see our unit, Julio.

With three sets of hands to help, unloading took less than 10 minutes. After a brief rest, I drove the guys back to their apartments - it was the least I could do. Then I dropped the car off back at the 79th St garage. Easy peasy. I tapped my ZipCard on the windshield sensor again to confirm my dropoff time, and just like that I was done.

I still think the ZipCar is a bit expensive, but not having to worry paying for about gas or making sure it's at the exact same level as when I picked up the car (or tolls if I had needed to pay one) is a nice touch. Maybe next time I go up to CT to do my laundry, I'll take a ZipCar. Hmmm....

Enterprise-rent-a-car: Masters of embarrassment

Like I've said before, I miss my SUV already. And never more than today.

My friend M and I got a storage unit, and my boxes have been sitting around my apartment for the last several weeks. This is mostly because I haven't really been home on the weekends to move them or if I was I was probably still unpacking. But now I'm pretty much unpacked and my extra crap is ready to go to storage. It's the American way.

I need a car to get the stuff to the unit. I considered borrowing my Dad's SUV, but the 1.5 hour drive each way to pick it up plus tolls wasn't very enticing. I considered signing up for ZipCar, but I don't want to wait 2 weeks for my ZipCard to come. So I decided to rent from Enterprise. I've rented from them many times before (in Connecticut, Colorado, Chicago, Los Angeles and Ohio) and usually had good experiences. I usually employ the three strike rule with companies I use a lot - 3 idiotic customer service moves and I'm done. Because you're never going to have a good experience every time and I understand that. Just something to keep in mind. Plus, they sponsor Dale Jr. and Martin Truex Jr. and that's OK with me.

Anyway, I called the nearest Enterprise office at 65th and 1st on Friday to see about renting a car by the hour today. I wasn't even sure if I could do that. But sure enough I could. I asked for a station wagon. They said they didn't have any station wagons, but they could give me a hatchback. Is there a difference?!? Maybe that should have been a hint to me. They take some basic information and ask me to bring a major credit card.

I called up R and T and asked them to be my big strong boys and help me pack up the crap into the rental car. I probably could have done it by myself, but I was worried about not being able to find parking near my building. If I had to double park, I would need to pack up as quickly as possible.

The boys came over before NFL started and I cooked them lunch. Come 2:30, I left for Enterprise. I decided to walk. I got there early and sat on an available doorstep until the gate went up. Everything went smoothly at first. They had my reservation and asked me for my driver's license and my credit card. I handed both over but the attendant said she needed a major credit card, not a debit card because I have an out-of-state license (I still have my Colorado license from college since my car was registered there). So I hand over my American Express card without thinking. The attendant says she's going to charge a $350 deposit to the card...fuck. I forgot about this. Enterprise puts a hold on your credit card. My card is maxed after the move. But since I'm a regular customer and they have waived this for me before, I ask them to do it again. The following (paraphrased) conversation took place.

Me - There's not $350 available on my credit card. I rent from Enterprise a lot and usually you guys waive this for me.
Attendant - They do? Really? We can't do that. Can we run less, say $250?
Me - No. I think there's like $50 available on there. I purposely keep my credit limit low.
Attendant - Well, can you call your credit card company and see how much is available?
Me - Um, no. I'm not going to do that. I know there's definitely less than $100 available. Again, I keep it low on purpose.
Attendant - OK. (weak smile) I need to ask my manager.

The attendant left to get her manager. There's a crowd in the office since it just opened. I see another customer ask her question, and she starts helping the other customer! Leaves me hanging. Now I'm annoyed. She comes back in and tells me she's waiting for the manager to come back in. I tell her I do have another credit card with the $35o available at my apartment - can I take the car and call back with the number? No, she replied. We have to physically swipe it. Okay...right...sure...The manager came back in and I go through pretty much the same exchange...

Me - There's not $350 available on my credit card. I rent from Enterprise a lot and usually you guys waive this for me.
Manager - We can't do that. Can we run less, say $250?
Me - No. I think there's like $50 available on there. I purposely keep my credit limit low.
Manager - Well, can you call your credit card company and see how much is available?
Me - No...I know there's definitely less than $100 available. Again, I do this on purpose. I'm not going to call them.
Manager - I understand. (weak smile) Could we run $50 on the Amex, and the rest on the debit card?
Me - thinks about it for a minute. If you have to, okay.
Manager - obviously wasn't expecting that. Actually, I don't think I can split it.
Me - trying new approach Can you run my debit as credit? I have plenty in there. (I'm annoyed that I now have to justify my finances.)
Manager - No, I'm sorry. It's not me, it's corporate policy. I can call my boss and see if he can waive the fee.
Me - OK.

The manager went to her desk to call her manager. I was trying not to be annoyed, but this was ridiculous. The rental was going to cost me less than $40, but they had to call the manager to see if they could wave A $350 HOLDING FEE? A fee that had to be run on a credit card? You have got to be kidding me. How did they serve people without credit cards? Bureaucracy at it's best - Capitol Hill would be so proud!

Also, I hate how when one customer is dissatisfied the attendants are overly nice to everyone else. It just made me feel worse about the whole situation. The manager couldn't reach her manager right away. I stood up at the front desk for another 20 minutes. T called and asked where I was. I explained the situation to him. He told me that was bullshit and I should just leave. And he was right. But I really needed the car. I wanted to get the boxes out of my apartment. I felt a bit deflated - I should have stood for my morals and just left. I felt like the dude who got arrested at Circuit City for refusing to show his receipt. T asks if he can run my other card down to me. No, I reply, it's locked in my safe.

I ask the manager if someone can give me a ride back to my apartment so I can pick up the other card. She tells me the guy left to give other people rides home and she doesn't think she's allowed to do that. Huh? Isn't Enterprise the company that picks you up? Apparently that doesn't count if you don't have a major credit card to pay their ridiculous deposit. ALL of this could have been avoided if they'd just told me about the deposit before. I could have either a) brought my other card with me or b) decided to take my business elsewhere.

At this point, I'm feeling pretty embarrassed. I've now been there 45 minutes waiting. I sat down in the back of the reception area because I felt like I was in the way. The manager was helping other people and the phone keeps ringing but no one answers it. So maybe her manager did call back during that time, maybe not. I feel like my business is no longer wanted. A third attendant asked if I'm being helped and I can only nod because I was choking back tears. T calls me again and asks if I'm OK. That does it - tears start streaming down my cheeks. I cover my face so no one else can see. Leave, he says.

I wish I had. Because the embarrassment isn't over! The manager calls her manager again, and I get rejected. So she tells me this across the room with other customers there! Thank you, I was really hoping everyone would know. She is says she's sorry but I'm already on my way out the door. I couldn't even speak to tell her about my other card at my apartment. It didn't matter anymore - I just wanted to get the hell out of there. I'd been embarrassed enough for one day. I fumbled around my purse for my sunglasses and began the walk of shame.

If you've never walked in NYC while crying, consider yourself lucky. I can't imagine how horrible I looked but I'm sure it wasn't a pretty site. Luckily it was less than 15 blocks. I was pretty calm by 69th St but I lost it again at 72nd when I started thinking about Hunk and how handy he would have been today. Argh!

Back at my building, R and T heard me before I got to my door and opened it. They both gave me bear hugs and told me it would be OK. Sigh. I cried like a little baby for a bit and then became resigned to my fate. At least we'll get to watch some football. I told them that was the 3rd strike for Enterprise - we made up the rules together with some friends in college, so they nodded knowingly.

Just for the record the other two bad experiences were:

• Reserved a car while Hunk was getting serviced. Took them 45 minutes to pick me up from the dealership (their office was across the street but Saturn wouldn't let me walk there because the street was a four-lane highway) and then since it was a no-charge rental they tried to give me a car with an empty tank! The car smelled like ass and had soft brakes.
  
• Was given a car with engine problems. Broke down on I-70 on my way back to Connecticut from Ohio. Called AAA, then called Enterprise to tell them. "Oh yeah," said attendant. "That car has an engine problem. It wasn't supposed to go out."
  

So Enterprise is officially on my suck list, joining these other companies known for their sterling record of customer service: Dell, Comcast, Qwest (Colorado phone company) and Clear Channel.

Oh, and I'm totally signing up for ZipCar. Hopefully it goes a bit better.

I need a little Vroom

I knew this was going to happen - I so miss my SUV. I'm one of those people that really likes to drive. I drove to Colorado for college every August, and each following May I'd drive back East to Connecticut. I loved testing my first car, a little red coupe, on the twisty back roads and I loved pile-driving through the snow in my small-for-an-SUV grey beast.

No, I don't need a car in NYC. Although it would be nice to have one about now to transport my stuff to the storage unit I just rented. The insurance cost, parking cost, worrying cost and plain old cost would be far too much for me to bear. But on those days when I wanted to escape the city...it'd be nice to have a car. On those days when I need to transport lots of crap...it'd be nice to have a car. On those days when I need to go somewhere just outside the city, beyond the limits of mass transportation...it'd be nice to have a car.

Right now I'd love to have a Mini Cooper. Zipcar runs them as their main fleet car in NYC. For those who don't know, Zipcar is a rental-car type service with a unique spin. You pay an annual fee (depends on what plan you sign up for) and then pay to rent a car either by hour or day. Your insurance, gas and tolls are all paid for by Zipcar, which is very nice in Gotham. I feel like it's a pretty good deal if you're renting by the hour. But by the day it works out about the same or maybe even a bit more than a rental place like Enterprise.

Of course, the main appeal for urban hipsters are the cars they rent. Scions, Minis, Mazda 3's and 6's...no granny cars on the lot. Last time I rented from a mass agency I got a Chevy Monte Carlo. Other than feeling like Dale Earnhardt it was less than fun. It was a pain in the ass to park and it had surprisingly little go on the highway. And it was a boat.

A boat would never work in the city. Cars I'd never considered like Nissan Versas or Toyota Fits suddenly become appealing, parallel-parking friendly options. But once I got outside the city those cars would feel like little Davids to the soccer parent's hulking Goliath tanks.

Or how about a Vespa? I wanted one in college. A little scooter to get me from place to place, carry my groceries. Like a convertible, it'd be a two to three-season vehicle. And certainly a Vespa would be no help getting my crap to storage. But in absence of a motorcycle, it would be fun.

My renter's insurance premium went up by over $100 as soon as I moved down here, so I can only imagine what my insurance premium would have done. Tripled? And parking is at least $350/mo. I have a friend who lives in Manhattan but parks his car in the Bronx because it's cheaper. What's the point? You have to take the subway or bus to just to get to your car? And forget parking on the street. I worried about my car parked on the streets of idyllic Norwalk. Parking on a Manhattan street would surely drive me insane with worry.

Yet still, it would be great to have a little car waiting so I drive out my stress. Perhaps once fame and/or fortune find me.